Family Life Resource

Do you have personal quirks such as cracking your knuckles, or picking your teeth at the dinner table?  If so, you may likely find your kids mimicking your behavior.  Parental quirks are sometimes imprinted on kids. They want to be like you; and tend to follow your lead; sometimes to their detriment.  Are you passing on your quirks to your kids? 

At a very early age, kids are influenced by your every word and action.  There is a wonderful commercial on TV which illustrates this point. A father takes a slice of bread and smears peanut butter on it. His daughter comes to sit beside him, and proceeds to do the same. The father then folds the slice of bread. His daughter asks why he does that, and he says, “Because my dad used to eat it this way.” Looking the other way, the father glances over to his daughter who begins to fold the slice of bread just like her dad.

While this is considered benign behavior, there are cases in which your quirks may encompass more severe consequences.  Sometimes, our actions can produce unhealthy results.  Perhaps you are a neat-freak. Your kids may adapt to the same method of cleanliness which can add psychological stress.  For example: if your child drops a glass of milk on the kitchen floor, the anxiety can become too much to handle. The fear of your reaction triggers the angst.

Everyone has a habit or a particular quirk; the trick is to recognize it and modify your behavior.  If you tend to yell at the drop of a hat; your kids will grow up thinking its okay. Remember, not being exposed to any other family’s behavior can make it appear normal.  It is important from the outset, to resist the temptation to expose your kids to anything but civil and proper behavior.  Passing on your quirks to your kids can cause embarrassing and possibly affect their future behavior as adults.

Filed under: Parenting Helps on January 16th, 2007